My head is throbbing and my frustration has reached an ultimate high. We have reached the point with a two-year-old and four-year-old, where they both want to be heard, they both want my attention, they are yelling at me, calling my name, shouting for my full attention. I'm trying, I really am. But between the daily household chores, making meals (mostly for the munchkins) and taking two seconds for myself here and there, I am stretched too thin and everyone is grouchy.
This new way of life, where my two-year-old boy has decided he wants to talk as much as his older sister, we are all shouting and begging to be heard. I raise my voice....."please stop talking for one second, please, I can only do one thing at a time." They shout, then they whine, then I want to cry.
Time to take a deep breath.
I have recognized the problem and I'm it. Patience is a virtue and over the past few years mine has dwindled. I think most of us mommy's can find peace simply by stepping back, taking a deep breath and refusing to yell. No, its not realistic all the time.....but for the most part, our yelling is a domino affect. I'm gonna give it a try....will you?
Friday, July 23, 2010
Thursday, June 17, 2010
IT TAKES A VILLAGE!
I've always heard that it takes a village to raise a child and I was never really sure I agreed with the idea. My kid, my rules! But suddenly, as I live each day, raising two young children as a stay-at-home mom I begin to understand exactly what this "village" thing means.
Human beings once lived in groups. Families lived together in communities, sometimes in the same home.....whatever the exact living conditions may have been, they were together. In many cultures and countries this is still the way of life, but in the United States we see a much different portrait of families.
Grow up, move away from your parents and siblings and do your own thing. Begin your own family and the process continues. We are independent, strong individuals, but what affect is this having on us as a whole.
Well, when I was a child, my mom took me and my sister to my grandmothers house almost every afternoon. My aunts and my cousins were all there and as our mothers sat together and had lunch, we played dress up, wrote plays, rode our bikes and explored the world together as a team. We had an amazing time, it was good for us, good for our mothers and I'm sure it was fabulous for my grandmother. We all had each other.... is there anything better in the world?
I, however, like many people I know, am raising kids away from extended family. I talk to my cousin, (who I played with each and every afternoon in my childhood) over the phone each day but I would much rather lean on her physically then over a telephone. I wish our children could play together as we once did, rather than shout hello over a phone call and play once every two months when the trips can be planned. We find ourselves in mommy and me groups where we pay for our kids to have friends and for us to have other mommies to talk to. We have to put up with obnoxious people we would rather not surround ourselves with because its the only option. If your family annoys you, you tell them. If some dimwitted mother at mommy-and-me class does something obnoxious you have to look the other way or risk ruining the "good thing you got going".
Its a sad day when we gather in groups with singing teachers telling us to clap our hands and sing stupid songs, rather than bonding in our own homes with the people we are closest to, who we love dearly and can trust with all our heart.
Maybe a "village" isn't such a terrible thing!
Human beings once lived in groups. Families lived together in communities, sometimes in the same home.....whatever the exact living conditions may have been, they were together. In many cultures and countries this is still the way of life, but in the United States we see a much different portrait of families.
Grow up, move away from your parents and siblings and do your own thing. Begin your own family and the process continues. We are independent, strong individuals, but what affect is this having on us as a whole.
Well, when I was a child, my mom took me and my sister to my grandmothers house almost every afternoon. My aunts and my cousins were all there and as our mothers sat together and had lunch, we played dress up, wrote plays, rode our bikes and explored the world together as a team. We had an amazing time, it was good for us, good for our mothers and I'm sure it was fabulous for my grandmother. We all had each other.... is there anything better in the world?
I, however, like many people I know, am raising kids away from extended family. I talk to my cousin, (who I played with each and every afternoon in my childhood) over the phone each day but I would much rather lean on her physically then over a telephone. I wish our children could play together as we once did, rather than shout hello over a phone call and play once every two months when the trips can be planned. We find ourselves in mommy and me groups where we pay for our kids to have friends and for us to have other mommies to talk to. We have to put up with obnoxious people we would rather not surround ourselves with because its the only option. If your family annoys you, you tell them. If some dimwitted mother at mommy-and-me class does something obnoxious you have to look the other way or risk ruining the "good thing you got going".
Its a sad day when we gather in groups with singing teachers telling us to clap our hands and sing stupid songs, rather than bonding in our own homes with the people we are closest to, who we love dearly and can trust with all our heart.
Maybe a "village" isn't such a terrible thing!
Sunday, May 30, 2010
I LOVE LUCY
My mom likes to call me Lucy. When I call her and begin my long twisted account of daily activities, she says, "Okay Lucy". Maybe its because I tell her I opened the front door, the dog went running out barking like a psycho, the phone rings and I run back in to get it, meanwhile the two-year-old munchkin goes running outside right into a pile of fresh dog do, I hang up the phone, grab the kid and start to rinse off the foot while he is screaming and the dogs barking and the four year old munchkin starts saying "hey mom, lets play Barbie's...you can be this girl and you have to dress her in the blue dress and mom, mom, mom, mom" all the while the other kid is screaming about water spraying everywhere and the dog is barking at a guy across the street who thinks its amusing to stand in front of the gate even though its obviously annoying the dog and seriously I just want to scream!!!!!!!!!!!
So I tell my mom on the phone how chaotic the past hour was and she calls me Lucy. For some reason, these stories remind her of the absolutely marvelous I LOVE LUCY show which I watched on re-runs on Nick-at-Night when I was a teenager babysitting at 10pm on a friday night. All I know is sometimes I wish I was Lucy, because at least she had a spectacular laugh track!
So I tell my mom on the phone how chaotic the past hour was and she calls me Lucy. For some reason, these stories remind her of the absolutely marvelous I LOVE LUCY show which I watched on re-runs on Nick-at-Night when I was a teenager babysitting at 10pm on a friday night. All I know is sometimes I wish I was Lucy, because at least she had a spectacular laugh track!
Thursday, May 20, 2010
Circus
Do you ever feel like your life is a circus? Not the elephants, clowns and ringmaster side of the circus, but the chaos, the messiness, the set up, knock down, set up again aspect of a circus that goes on and on and on again? Do you feel like things are moving around you and you are trying desperately to keep up, to enjoy the party because it can’t go on forever. I feel this insanity sometimes, an insanity that is not bad, it’s a whirlwind that is both exciting and wonderful while also being a bit overwhelming and a little difficult to completely understand.
I live an amazingly beautiful life that I am always battling. I am a control freak to the umpteenth degree; I have been since the day I was born. Its nothing I was taught. It is born within me and I try to mask it, or at least calm it down each and every day. But with this trait, I am doomed. I am set up for disaster, because no one can control everything, yet my mind is always looking for a way.
I am a stay at home mom in a community where having a nanny, a house keeper and a place to send your kids everyday is the norm. I do not partake in any of these absurd activities. My husband works in a crazy business that is unpredictable and frustrating. I am old-fashion, with conservative values and I am constantly trying to give my children the childhood I believe kids should have but few seem to get these days. I am devoted to cooking healthy and satisfying meals, teaching through experience, and giving them memories like monthly zoo trips and big birthday bashes. I am so wrapped up in this goal, however that I feel like I never stop. I feel like I live in a three-ring circus that is of my own creation and it terrifies me that if I slow down it could all come crashing to an end.
I live an amazingly beautiful life that I am always battling. I am a control freak to the umpteenth degree; I have been since the day I was born. Its nothing I was taught. It is born within me and I try to mask it, or at least calm it down each and every day. But with this trait, I am doomed. I am set up for disaster, because no one can control everything, yet my mind is always looking for a way.
I am a stay at home mom in a community where having a nanny, a house keeper and a place to send your kids everyday is the norm. I do not partake in any of these absurd activities. My husband works in a crazy business that is unpredictable and frustrating. I am old-fashion, with conservative values and I am constantly trying to give my children the childhood I believe kids should have but few seem to get these days. I am devoted to cooking healthy and satisfying meals, teaching through experience, and giving them memories like monthly zoo trips and big birthday bashes. I am so wrapped up in this goal, however that I feel like I never stop. I feel like I live in a three-ring circus that is of my own creation and it terrifies me that if I slow down it could all come crashing to an end.
Tuesday, May 11, 2010
food
Why is it that being a mommy turns even the most simple tasks into a massive decision or situation? Today I was talking to my favorite fellow mommy and we suddenly got into a very detailed chat about lunch. We had spent lunch time feeding our munchkins and snacking off their plates. We definitely didnt eat a meals worth (but in calories in fat we were probably just fine) but we were suddenly facing a major debate, make ourselves lunch or try to make it til dinner. OH MAN, decisions decisions!
I opted to make myself lunch, warming up leftovers from dinner two nights ago and ate way more than i needed. And now as I prep dinner I find myself snacking on potato chips. I am a healthy girl who usually avoids such things and am not PMS-ing, so whats the deal? I have no idea, but as I prepare dinner I am already filling up on things I DONT need to eat.
Part of me thinks its my mind working overtime, trying to enjoy a snack because god knows I wont be enjoying dinner. I havent enjoyed dinner in quite some time.......instead getting up every few minutes to fetch something for someone or clean up spilled milk. Somehow, someway I think subconsciously I am stealing these delicious chips and savoring the texture, taste and smell of Blue BBQ Kettle Chips simply because I can.
I know I'm crazy.....but what the heck!
I opted to make myself lunch, warming up leftovers from dinner two nights ago and ate way more than i needed. And now as I prep dinner I find myself snacking on potato chips. I am a healthy girl who usually avoids such things and am not PMS-ing, so whats the deal? I have no idea, but as I prepare dinner I am already filling up on things I DONT need to eat.
Part of me thinks its my mind working overtime, trying to enjoy a snack because god knows I wont be enjoying dinner. I havent enjoyed dinner in quite some time.......instead getting up every few minutes to fetch something for someone or clean up spilled milk. Somehow, someway I think subconsciously I am stealing these delicious chips and savoring the texture, taste and smell of Blue BBQ Kettle Chips simply because I can.
I know I'm crazy.....but what the heck!
Monday, May 10, 2010
PARENTING BOOKS
Has anyone ever noticed that parenting books are ridiculous? A have numerous friends who love parenting books and listen to all sorts of BS written by apparent experts. But seriously, who are these people who write these books? The week after my daughter was born I took an oversized and incredibly obnoxious book about baby and sleep patterns and chucked it across my living room. I have never touched another parenting book since. Kids don't fit in the pigeon holes created by these books and I refuse to try to fit my marvelous munchkins in such categories created by authors who sit around and spew parenting advice. Ask me about kids sleep and I have all sorts of comments, but the first thing I say is toss the parenting book you are trying to emulate. Its not gonna happen.
My cousin calls me almost everyday to ask me questions about her kids sleep. I give her my thoughts and just about every time she replies with, "you should write a book". Um, ya, that will never HAPPEN!
My cousin calls me almost everyday to ask me questions about her kids sleep. I give her my thoughts and just about every time she replies with, "you should write a book". Um, ya, that will never HAPPEN!
COMPLETE CHAOS
We are playing outside quietly, enjoying our beautiful afternoon with action figures, sticker books and a plastic food smorgasbord when all hell broke loose. We are potty training kiddo number two and its been a difficult task. He started to kick and scream when I told him it was potty time! Then kiddo number one needed help with her writing skills.
Mommy, how do you write a "W"
AHHHHHHHH NO POTTY"
Mommy, is the "M" like an "N" but one more line?
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO, NO PEEEEEEEE!
Mommy, look, I did it, I wrote the words, look mom!
LEAVE ME ALONE, LEAVE ME ALONE, LEAVE ME ALOOOOOOOOOOOONE!
I started to lose it. One kid being sweet and one being a terrible monster. I am standing in the doorway of the bathroom, one kid is inside and one kid is outside. I am being shouted at from both directions and I want to sit down and put my head between my legs. I want to say "everyone get away from me" but I'm a better mom than that. I carry monster to his room and tell him to come out when he's ready to pee, I take sweetie pie back outside and read the note she masterfully wrote at four years old. I am grinning and bearing it, my head is throbbing and I know this is only one of twenty more obstacles to cloud the day! We will make it through, I tell myself, we will make it through!
Mommy, how do you write a "W"
AHHHHHHHH NO POTTY"
Mommy, is the "M" like an "N" but one more line?
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO, NO PEEEEEEEE!
Mommy, look, I did it, I wrote the words, look mom!
LEAVE ME ALONE, LEAVE ME ALONE, LEAVE ME ALOOOOOOOOOOOONE!
I started to lose it. One kid being sweet and one being a terrible monster. I am standing in the doorway of the bathroom, one kid is inside and one kid is outside. I am being shouted at from both directions and I want to sit down and put my head between my legs. I want to say "everyone get away from me" but I'm a better mom than that. I carry monster to his room and tell him to come out when he's ready to pee, I take sweetie pie back outside and read the note she masterfully wrote at four years old. I am grinning and bearing it, my head is throbbing and I know this is only one of twenty more obstacles to cloud the day! We will make it through, I tell myself, we will make it through!
HELLO THERE!
I am a mommy to two hilarious kids! I love my life, my husband, kids and friends. I feel very blessed every single day!
Somedays, however, I feel like I am losing my mind. This blog is for all the mommies who love staying home with their adorable, fun, silly little munchkins and wouldn't want it any other way....although there are moments when our world is spinning so completely out of control and we feel totally isolated in our chaos.
We are all having crazy days and sometimes you need to be reminded that you are not alone. As I tell my favorite stay-at-home mommy on a regular basis, no ones kids sleep...they just don't talk about it! Here, we will talk about it.
Somedays, however, I feel like I am losing my mind. This blog is for all the mommies who love staying home with their adorable, fun, silly little munchkins and wouldn't want it any other way....although there are moments when our world is spinning so completely out of control and we feel totally isolated in our chaos.
We are all having crazy days and sometimes you need to be reminded that you are not alone. As I tell my favorite stay-at-home mommy on a regular basis, no ones kids sleep...they just don't talk about it! Here, we will talk about it.
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